Action-Adventure Mega Review: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was the first game based on the quartet of pizza-loving sewer dwellers. It was also Konami's first game based on the property. The end result missed the mark in nearly every aspect, but it did lay the groundwork for the much more beloved games that followed.

If there was ever a game that I wondered how on earth I managed to complete as a child, this was it. The game starts out on an overhead map. You can change between turtles whenever you like by hitting the start button. These are the best parts of the game. The game goes downhill from there. Once you enter the sewer, the game switches to an action platformer. The problem is that jumping feels off and the level design is hit-or-miss. When it misses, it really misses. You can control the height of your jump with light button taps, but often the level will put a ceiling between where the turtle is and the platform to which he has to jump. This leads to infuriating sessions where the current area has to be completed again since the enemies respawn. The Cowabunga Collection minimizes hair-pulling as it has a rewind button. This is definitely the preferred way to play, as even seasoned platformer players will fail to make a jump at least once in the game.

The other infuriating thing is that Donatello and Leonardo are the only useful turtles. Michaelangelo and Raphael have a very small range compared to the two aforementioned ninja-practicing testudines. The best thing to do is to leave Raphael and Michaelangelo for areas where it is nearly impossible to not lose health. 

This brings us to the worst part of the game, the dam section. Without the save function of the Cowabunga Collection, I would not blame anyone who rage quit after trying this level. Heck, I wouldn't blame anyone who rage quit even with the save function. The turtles have to swim through a maze to disarm eight bombs in only eight minutes. Impeding them are electric beams and electrified seaweed. The latter is the worst part as it is nearly impossible to make it through without hitting seaweed since the path is so narrow and pressing the swim button causes the turtle to rise up quite a large amount. Also, the time limit makes careful swimming impossible. The time limit also makes waiting for the electric beams to stop a challenge. It's nearly impossible to make it through without draining the health of one, or likely two, turtles. That is why it is best to save the weakest turtles in this game, Michaelangelo and Raphael, for this level.

The overhead level actually becomes quite a bit of fun when you get to the point where you can drive the party wagon. Walking enemies can be run over and vehicles can be hit with bullets shot out from the wagon. Once you get the missiles, you can destroy enemy vehicles with one hit. It's tempting to just fire away at vehicles with missiles, but there are also blockades that can only be destroyed with missiles. Sadly, the fun overworld driving sections only last for one level, and most of that level is spent going in and out of sewers and buildings searching for missiles and grappling hooks that you will need to get to sections that can't be jumped across. With these sections being platforming sections, the fun of the overhead section is quickly overshadowed.

Alongside the Nintendo Entertainment System version, it was also released for Amiga, Amstrad CPC, Arcade via PlayChoice-10, Atari ST, Commodore 64, DOS, MSX, and ZX Spectrum. Some of these versions have more appealing graphics, but the platforming sections are surprisingly even less responsive. This makes the NES version the best of the bunch, which isn't saying much.

The one bright spot of this game is the music. Even though there are mainly only two musical scores for the overhead and underworld levels, with the exception of some new music in the final level, they are really great and can get stuck in your head well after the game is over. When I was a little girl, I would just stand in place on the overhead map or hang out in an enemy-free part of the sewer just to hear the music.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is probably best summed up as a game with some good ideas that are poorly implemented. Some of the ideas, such as the spin attack powerup would make its way into better Konami games such as Turtles in Time and Hyperstone Heist. Other than the music and the short overhead sections, there's not much to recommend. It would be a mediocre game, but the terrible dam level takes it even lower. Unless you're playing with the emulator functions in Cowabunga Collection, don't bother playing it. Even with the collection, there's really no point playing it unless you want to earn the achievement for doing so.

Final Verdict:
1½ out of 5

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Arcade Game Review